I want to take a break from talking about raising human offspring into productive members of society for just a moment and talk about something even more pressing.
I am single.
Not only am I single, but a single uncle who cares for his unique (dare I say special) nephew.
In a couples parenting world, that alone is enough to ostracize me.
Do you have any idea how hard you couples make raising kids on single parental figures? Not just single parents, but single relatives of any kind?
We single parental figures have to work twice as hard for twice as long to make sure these rabid human spawn grow up semi decently. If that’s not enough to make one seriously consider taking up alcoholism as a hobby, we also have to deal with you. Yes. You.
You gather in your couples cliques at the playground as your little monsters run amuck and gossip about the kid whose uncle struggled to bring in fruit rollups for the congregation of holy terrors that are the kids for last snack time. On your high horses, you pass judgement on those of us not in a serious relationship or, heck, those of us not biologically related to the kids we are trying to raise.
Stop. Just stop.
It’s not that we necessarily WANT to do this tough job of raising these monsters alone. It’s that we have to.
Parenting is hard enough without having to deal with petty nonsense like couples judging you for every little thing.
Let’s just all breathe and do this parenting thing together. We are collectively raising the next generation. Maybe if we act like we get along, they will too.
Single Parental Figures Unite!
PS: Check me out on Tinder.
***Disclaimer***Azra has been around children for centuries. While not having any of his own, part of being an exiled angel means blending in on earth. As he traveled the earth, he picked up on a lot of parenting practices across the globe. This blog is meant to share his parenting wisdom with a new generation. And to win a bet.
*Note: any advice given is meant to be satirical and not to be taken literally. Please do not exercise it upon any living being, child or otherwise.*