April Suggestion

Since Easter and April Fool's Day landed on the same day this year, pulling a prank on the actual day would be too obvious. However, pulling the prank the following weekend would be a "joyful" scene your family would never see coming. Here are a list of suggested pranks (*Disclaimer: I do not actually recommend you try any of theses unless you have unlimited funds, too much free time, and don't think they would leave any permanent emotional scarring):

1. Set-up all of the Easter decor once again and let your family wake up to think they've gone back in time.

2. You can keep repeating #1 to make everyone think they are trapped in a Groundhog's Day scenario.

3. Fill your house with rabbits. Then make everyone else clean up after them.

4. Have Night of the Lepus playing 24-7 on every TV, then hide all remotes and make the TVs impossible to turn off (*Side note: Look up Night of the Lepus if you have no clue what I'm talking about. It's magical)

5. Glue frilly Easter Bonnets to everyone's head while they sleep

6. Cover the front lawn of every house with plastic Easter Grass and replace the street signs with "Welcome to Fluffville."

7. Hide extra eggs which have not been hard boiled, then don't tell anyone about them. When the stench starts, pretend you smell nothing.

8. Replace the chicken eggs with lizard eggs and wait for them to hatch.

9. Give out only licorice jelly beans.

10. Take away the children's candy and tell them that it must be sacrificed or Spring will never come.

11. Paint everything in pastel colors. Ev-er-y-thing.

It will all be so full of the chocolate, egg, Christian, Pagan, and April Fools spirit. Everyone will be impressed that you cared enough to prank them as a surprise. And isn't that real meaning of whichever holiday we're talking about? No. Seriously. I already forgot.

While I Scramble


                It has happened again! I have been placed in mortal danger. Being a peasant is really getting to be a pain these days!

                This morning a giant griffin flew over my village, picked me up in her paws, and dropped me into a giant nest. Then, she left again to find more food.

                Here I sit in the middle of three eggs and have been sitting for several hours. The eggs sound almost ready to hatch. I keep hearing scratching and cracking. Soon, I will be regurgitated griffin baby food.

                Do griffins regurgitate their food? I would assume so since the head is like a bird. But their stomach is in the lion part of their body. Perhaps they have the innards of a lion as well. If they feed their young like a lion would, I imagine there will still be a great deal of tearing at my flesh before the initial feeding process begins.

                I appear to be fated to be someone’s dinner. If I am going to be devoured by beasties, this is not the worst of it. Babies do need to eat. At least I am helping with the circle of life, right?


                Oh! A shell just cracked open. I see a beak! Why am I excited about this? I am about to become baby’s first meal. But this little griffin is just so darn adorable. He is making these peep noises and trying to shake bits of shell off of his skinny, featherless wings. Of course, he’s the size of a border collie so his “peeps” are loud enough to shake the nest.

                He just noticed me! What do I do? What do I do? Do I try to hide behind one of the other eggs? Too late. He’s coming towards me. Better just get this over with. Maybe if I offer my head first, it will all end quickly.

                His beak is moving towards me. I hope it’s sharp enough to—

                And he’s nuzzling me. And purring.

                Griffins purr. Who knew?

                I think I just became an uncle.

                Now? How do I get down?