Monkeys of Betrayal


                Fictional monkeys. Such good sidekicks. Abu. Boots. Playful Heart Monkey (yes, Care Bears count). So cute. So silly. So loyal. So nothing like what you see at the zoo. Or are they?

Here is my list of top five fictional monkeys who deceived us in some way (spoilers ahead):

5. The Evil Monkey who Lives in Chris Griffin’s Closet

                Even though he was once a good monkey who overcomes his grief to go back to being a good monkey, this Family Guy reoccurring sight gag tormented a kid season after season because he was bitter that his monkey wife cheated on him. I know this is a show of illogical jokes, but who constantly points menacingly from within a closet in stranger’s house? He wasn’t actually evil, but he was most certainly a jackass.

4.  All Organ Grinder Monkeys

                This is a generalized comment on all classic films which featured an organ grinder and his cute little monkey grifter. Don’t be fooled by the man turning the crank and playing the music. The true mastermind behind this sidewalk attraction was always the monkey. You know that little so-and-so was using the ploy to pick pockets and spread fleas just for the fun of it.

3. Jack the Monkey

                I secretly like this buccaneer monkey from the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. That being said, let’s face it – he was a little jerk. He was obsessed with cursed gold, he was the minion of a traitor, and he was dressed better than most of the other pirates which, to me, suggests a sort of manipulative deviousness.

2. The Monkey from Raiders of the Lost Ark

                This was the first time as a child when I was not devastated when an animal in a movie died. Granted, I wasn’t thrilled, but it was not the Neverending Story horse or Bambi’s mom scenario. He spied on and was part of a plot to kill Indiana Jones. This was even after Marion was so sweet to him. Enough said.

1. Curious George

                He’s not a monkey! He has no tail! He’s an ape. The Man with the Yellow Hat is in league with a primate of lies!